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After-Dinner Testimonials

“We needed a speaker for a dinner and presentation evening for a group of future leaders who were completing a year long, high-profile managerial course. We wanted to secure someone that would be able to entertain and engage the group, and able to achieve that with a relatively small number of just 20.

John was able to use his experiences and business knowledge in an engaging manner that was perfect for our event. John exceeded our expectations in terms of his ability to personalise his speech to our audience. They were wholeheartedly impressed by his feats of memory and he had the group in raptures of laughter from the start.

Our evening was a great success and we believe our objective in providing an inspiring and funny speaker was more than fulfilled. We will not hesitate in calling on John again for our next event, he has a warmth, charm and great delivery style that is a valuable commodity.”
Andy Rowe, Training Director, Fiat Group Automobiles

“Thank you for your outstanding efforts in making Rainier’s annual Christmas dinner an enormous success. Everyone has spoken to me and they were all completely astounded with your memory skills and the warmth of your entertainment.”
Eric Grove, Chairman, Rainier Developments

“I just wanted to say a big thank you for your speech at our annual conference at Chateau Impney. You did really well and there were loads of very positive comments afterwards. Well done, that man!” Tim Cull, Head of Business Radio, Federation of Communication Services

“Safe to say you made a lasting impression on the audience! I had many many positive comments afterwards. Thank you so much for such a great performance – given you only had a couple of hours to prepare made it all the more impressive!”
Mike Harper, Chief Executive, Road Surface Treatment Association

“How fantastic are you!! The amount of positive feedback we had after your performance was just amazing! I have absolutely no idea how you remembered all those names, which tables and which position they were in the room!! Fantastic! Thank you so much for everything.”
Charlotte Bromley, Event Organiser, RSTA Annual Conference

“Thank you again for entertaining us so very well – the feedback has been tremendous! It was a real pleasure to work with you so thank you again for making the dinner what it was.”
Karen Sussex, Head of Membership and Administration, Timber Trades Federation

“Thank you so very much for last week, we have had some fantastic comments and a few requests from people on how best to contact you so they can book you. It was a huge success and went down very well!”
Zara Bailey, Head of Events, Investment Week

“Thank you so much for the great performance in Evian.  As we mentioned, they are quite a picky bunch but I have had nothing but positive feedback on your speech!”
Clare Sutherland, Events Director, Legal Week

“A huge thank you for your attendance at our Best Practice Awards Dinner. The feedback specifically for you has been absolutely excellent.  Everyone was talking about it at the after dinner drinks gathering which went on until 4.30am!

Your professionalism and attention to detail was staggering and you are unquestionably the best After Dinner Speaker we have ever had. It will certainly be my intention to ask you to join us again.”
Sue Uttridge, Company Secretary, Property Care Association

“With very little briefing from myself beforehand, John delivered an outstanding performance in many ways. He made us laugh, think, question, argue, reflect and smile – but most of all, he fully entertained all of us. Quite genuinely, I cannot remember any of our previous speakers creating so much positive comment over the following two days during the major show in which we were involved. I recommend him absolutely to our kind of business audience and wish him continued success.”   Chris Aylett – Chief Executive, Motorsport Industry Association

From email to agent after Crest Nicholson Senior Management conference dinner: “Just to let you know that John did an excellent job as our after dinner speaker on Monday night.

He was exceptionally entertaining and at the same time was able to reinforce some key messages from our workshop. He stunned the audience with his amazing ability to recall names and details of those present and this, coupled together with his excellent and witty story-telling meant that he was a fantastic all-round entertainer. The feedback I had had from those present has been extremely positive. Chris Ward, Change Management Director. Crest Nicholson PLC

From email to agent after Insurance Institute of Bournemouth annual Dinner, April 2016:

“Just a short note to say John was fabulous. It was an absolute pleasure working with him.  We’ve received some great feedback from the event attendees – it’s safe to say the event was a success and that is very much down to his engaging and amusing after dinner talk. He was very good at ‘working the audience’ and ever the professional with my team.”Kate Chastey, for Bournemouth Insurance Institute

“John Simonett was nothing short of magnificent at the Insurance Institute of Leicester annual dinner last night. His mixture of wholly original humour, of utterly astonishing feats of memory and of magic absolutely entranced his audience. This man gets better and better each time I see him perform. His performance was a tour de force, a triumph. In my view, he’s the best in the business.”
Alan Cleary, Stand and Deliver

Re SAPCA Dinner: Everyone thought you were marvellous, which you certainly were. People were telling me they thought you were the best after-dinner speaker we’d had. So that makes me a very happy event organiser! Many thanks again – we’ll certainly ask you back another day! Chris Trickey, Chief Executive, SAPCA

Just a quick note to thank you for your stunning performance at the British Universities Finance Directors Group conference in Manchester last night. The Gala dinner is the high point of the whole conference and I knew, from hearing you previously, that you would be a great success. In the event, you exceeded my expectations and I am extremely grateful. It seemed every single one of my Finance Director Colleagues said to me afterwards how much they enjoyed listening to you! Good luck for the future and thanks again.
Geoff Hope-Terry, Conference Host and Organiser, BUFDG

John – many many thanks from me too! You were absolutely stunning and people were talking about you all night!
Alison Holt, PA to Geoff Hope-Terry, Finance Director, Manchester University

It is with great pleasure I am able to extend my thanks for an absolutely first class performance from our recent charity evening in Spalding. We had 331 people attend on the night itself and prior to the event, I was constantly questioned to “who’s this John Simonett character?” After the event all I have heard is “What a fabulous choice”! Not only did you capture the mood of the evening, I believe you made it! You also completely captured the audience as well, mesmerising them with your ability and skill to recall individuals from memory.

In my opinion you had a very difficult task by following our surprise the “three waiters”, but not only did you manage to follow them successfully you became the main conversation point for days afterwards. Speaking from personal experience I know how difficult it can be to please my customers, so on that basis you have clearly over achieved! I will be recommending your services to all and sundry as easily the best after-dinner speaker I have seen in all the years I have been involved in organising or attending functions, with a very refreshing and uniquely delivered performance.

Once again I sincerely thank you for a first class performance and look forward to meeting you again in the not too distant future.
Chris Mizen, Profit Centre Manager, Edmundson Electrical Ltd

Many thanks for the very fine address you gave us at our luncheon on Thursday.  I always know the pleasure it gives us in the office when we provide our clients with a travel experience beyond their expectations. Well, I would like to say to you that you provided an experience beyond my expectation, and I am almost certain that goes for all those present. Without exception, I received positive responses; and the question “where did you find him”! I appreciate all the detailed hard work and preparation that I could see you put into your presentation. John, I shall say no more. I think you will realise that it goes without saying how grateful I am.
Andrew Drakesford, Chairman, Travel Luncheon Club

Thanks again for an excellent performance last Friday – you never cease to amaze me with that memory of yours. It’s always a great help to the organiser to have a true professional such as yourself as the main speaker.
Barry Blakely, Dinner Organiser, BIIBA South West

Dear John, Just a brief line to thank you for speaking at our annual dinner. As you may expect, we always seek feed-back from the guests after the event and we are delighted to confirm that this was all very positive with regard to your own participation. The room was extremely warm, the wine was freely flowing and yet you managed to keep the attention of your audience until almost midnight – no mean feat. I just wanted to add my personal thanks for playing such an important role in what was a thoroughly successful evening.
Chris Clarke ACII, President, BIIBA South West

What can I say – you were fantastic – so much so I have been telling everyone if they need an after dinner speaker then I will be more than happy to pass on your details – hope you don’t mind! I have emailed out to all the guys for feedback and you have had such excellent feedback – 10 out of 10, excellent, fantastic, the best speaker we have ever had etc.
Kind regards – and thanks again for so many laughs on the evening – my mascara was running!
Lee Nicholson, Axa Insurance plc

I’m writing on behalf of the President to pass on his thanks and also to pass on the numerous accolades that I have received about your performance at our Heads of Faculties conference – you were truly terrific! Not only did you manage to strike exactly the right tone (admittedly not always easy with a large group of senior academics!) but the message whilst pertinent was delivered in an imaginative and humorous manner – which made it all the more enjoyable.
Dr Jacqueline Henshaw Office of the President & Vice-Chancellor, Manchester University

Thank YOU! John. Your speech went down SO well. I was watching people’s reactions and faces and they were all enthralled! Everyone one I spoke to had enjoyed themselves immensely – and Richard and I are basking in the reflected glory! I don’t believe Richard will ever doubt my decisions in the future – something I’m looking forward to capitalising upon!
I’m sure there will be another occasion in the future when we can call upon your services again. In the meantime, very best wishes, and thank you for such a professional job.
Sylvia James, Conference Organiser, Travel Inn Property

Hi John: You went down an absolute storm at the Xplor Document Handling conference…a bit like a monsoon at the end of the wet season in India….! No I jest, as usual you were terrific, I know you always have a concern about people having seen you before but I have seen you 4 times in past years and I laugh and cry as much now as I did that first experience. I knew you would be a success to the gathering – it just took me 2 years to convince them!
John B Tippett, Business Development Manager, Ventura UK

Many thanks for your input to our annual partner dinner at the Honourable Artillery Company. Initial response suggests it has been the best received to date and I hope that you felt that the guests greatly appreciated your offerings. I will have no hesitation in making further recommendations and have already passed your details on in this respect.
Ewan M. Cresswell, Partner, Integra Loss Adjusters

It was a delight meeting you and I would like to thank you for coming up to our conference at Lumley Castle. I hope you enjoyed yourself as much as everyone enjoyed your after dinner speech. I must say that your approach of ‘the man from the FSA’ was fantastic and certainly had them fooled for a good few minutes. Everyone, without exception, felt that you were excellent and especially the “doubting Thomas'” of the group were well and truly won over. I think they were amazed that you joined them in the bar afterwards as well. The feedback was exceptionally positive and they all felt that it was an extremely good end to an unusual evening.
Helen Collins IFA Marketing Manager, Liverpool Victoria Intermediary Division.

We could have listened and watched you for hours, a very clever and entertaining performance.
David Reed, Wooden Spoon Rugby Charity

I am still getting e-mails from people who enjoyed the evening with you – congratulations on the exceptional performance you gave! We are looking forward to welcoming you to Zurich again for another Swiss Re event!
Antoine Kissenpfennig, Swiss Re, Ruschlikon, Zurich

Thank you so much for your contribution to our sales conference. What can I say? We have had many speakers over the years but nobody has received the ovation you did. Everyone is still talking about you and will continue to do so.
Brett Williams, Marketing Director, Sandvik Coromant

I just wanted to say thank you for coming to the Island to speak at the dinner last week. Everyone enjoyed themselves and we have received a lot of good comments (really for you). It was as always very professional and completely entertaining. I will let you know if I find any more willing but new audiences.
Lilian Boyle, Manx Insurance Association

Following Scottish Newspaper of the Year Awards Dinner
Just spoken to Susannah and she is raving about your performance last night. The feedback they have had has been excellent and very positive, so now you know Daniel felt coming through the ordeal!
David Meehan, David John Associates (booking agent)

Hi John, Thank you so much for last night. I spoke to David Meehan this morning and asked him to let you know how delighted we were. Both last night and this morning I received lots of positive feedback on your speech and Scottish and Universal newspapers were also asking for your details. In the meantime, have you any friends as I am already quizzing David on who I can get to follow you for next year?!
Susannah Moore, Organiser, Scottish Newspaper of the Year Awards

Just a quick note to thank you for your efforts on Thursday. Your speech went down extremely well and rounded off the evening perfectly!
Kate Goodings, Newcastle Law Society

Just a note to say thank you very much for your splendidly outstanding contribution to our conference. It was the talk for the rest of the evening – everyone saying how funny, witty and entertaining you were, and pondering how you knew who everyone was and where they were from, and even what they were thinking. Once again many thanks. I look forward to the pleasure of inviting you to be our guest speaker again in the future.
Glenys Nettleship, RDL Distribution

John, just a quick note to thank-you for last night. I can safely say that you were very well received and I have had nothing but positive feed back this morning.
Janette Jones, Ernst and Young, Scotland

The feedback from our customers was that the product launch event at Turnberry was a great success and I’d just like to thank you for your help in making the evening so enjoyable.
Derek Hill, Marketing Services Director, Weir Pumps Limited

from letter to booking agent:
Dear David
I understand you arranged the three speakers for our recent dealer meetings.
All three speakers performed very well and we would certainly recommend them to others. The pick of the three was John Simonett with his very unusual mix of humour and memory. I thought our comments might be useful.
Colin Mustoe, Director, Senator Furniture

Thank you for your excellent contribution to our conference dinner in Malaga on Wednesday. The feed back from the audience has been very positive – you amused and entertained them, and received thumbs up all round. I hope we have the opportunity to work together again in the future.
Pauline Hill, Head of Marketing, Finning Material Handling

Thank you so much for your fantastic performance in hosting the European Office Products Awards in Frankfurt. Your unique blend of humour and audience observation was a total hit with our delegates and we have had an overwhelming response to the event. Once again, thank you for making the first awards evening at Paperworld such a great success.
Lisa Rollaston, OPI Conferences

Just a personal line to thank you so much for your contribution to our annual dinner in Southampton last Friday. The after dinner delivery itself was excellent, and as you know, we were at a new venue for the dinner, with some 100 more than last year. As a council member, I heard nothing but praise for the event from those who had mastered the combined act of still being able to stand and be coherent (not that many in reality!). In particular, they were all delighted with your own unique contribution.
Ian Ritchie, Dinner Organiser, Southampton Insurance Institute

From letter to Booking Agent who engaged John at the above event:
Just to let you know privately what a success John was last Friday. I had no idea what to expect, and he did a very good ‘after dinner presentation’. The unexpected delight was when he went into, first, the memory routine, even to the extent of noting people who had moved seats! The audience was absolutely captivated. It was just brilliant, and I will recommend John to anybody looking for a last man up. As a Council member, I had nothing but positive feedback from members regarding venue, quality of food, service etc, but most importantly, as far as you are concerned, on John’s performance.
Ian M Ritchie ACII Dinner Organiser, Southampton Insurance Institute

John: thank you for your note. We have had 50 phone calls each one saying how fantastic you were. You made the evening!
Harvey Soning, Chairman, James Andrew International

Many thanks once again for a super evening at the Belfry. Both on the night and especially the next day I received numerous positive comments about your speech. You hit just the right tone with great humour. What was particularly pleasing was how you were able to remember and single out so many individuals. Much appreciated. Will certainly be recommending you in the future. Well done.
John Phipps, Managing Director, Dunelm Mill (Soft Furnishings)

Just a quick note to say thanks again for your speech to our Head Office staff in Rotterdam last Thursday. It was a real pleasure to see you in action again, and hitting all the right hot spots. It was a very successful evening for EyeOpeners, and also Logistics – clear evidence since that we knocked down some barriers!
Thanks and sincere best wishes.
Peter Ward, Director Europe, P & O Nedlloyd Logistics

John Simonett was nothing short of magnificent at the Insurance Institute of Leicester annual dinner last night. His mixture of wholly original humour and utterly astonishing feats of memory absolutely entranced his audience. This man gets better and better each time I see him perform. His performance was a tour de force, a triumph. In my view, he’s the best in the business.
Alan Cleary, Stand and Deliver Speaker Agency

Many thanks for your excellent after-dinner speech at our conference on Monday night. We were very impressed with all the preparation you did beforehand and during the meal; as I said to you at the time, it wasn’t the easiest event to prepare for, as the organisation is not one in which everyone knows everyone else, as they do in most companies. The tone and content of your talk was exactly right for the occasion and the audience, and I received a number of comments at the time about how much people enjoyed it. Several people also remarked on their conference evaluation forms to the same effect. Our main problem now, of course, is how to follow you at next year’s event! Many thanks once again for your substantial contribution to making the night a success.
Judith Halliwell, IMLPO (Institute of Money Laundering Professionals)

Thanks again for your time in Cyprus – I think that you really ‘read’ the audience well, and what you did worked very well for a European audience! I will certainly keep you in mind for any future requirements for after dinner speakers.
Vicki Hooper, Project Manager, Gusto Events for Extreme Networks EMEA Conference

Thank you very much for the wonderful job you did at our Annual Management Conference at the Marriott Damlahoy last week. It was an incredible evening and gloriously funny. I have received nothing but fantastic comments from all that attended with most of them saying it was the best they had heard! Julia Watts, PA to CEO, Aesica Pharmaceuticals

Dear John
Thank you for your kind message – but I should be thanking you. You are an exceptional speaker and a fantastic entertainer. I’m only sorry I didn’t get chance to thank you afterwards but you had such a queue of fans! So many of the delegates came up to me to say how impressed and amazed they were.
I was delighted that from Google I’d been able to pluck the perfect speaker for our event. And I’m glad that you enjoyed it too!
Thanks again – and best wishes
Maggie Turner, Head Teachers conference organiser, Independent Schools Association

Many Thanks indeed for a tremendous performance at the Demonstrators
Conference dinner. Everyone thoroughly enjoyed the evening and commented about your amazing abilities at various times during the Wednesday session.
Jane Kingsbury-Webber, Customer Liaison Manager, Aga Rayburn

From Booking Agency following client dinner for Arco Ltd:
Thank you! It would appear that you had an excellent night! The phone has been red hot this morning. The following are a few quotes for you today!
‘Very entertaining’ ‘terrific’ ‘best we have ever had’ ‘Excellent’ !
Thank you so much – your skill to incorporate so many names into the time available, with such humour has drawn great comment. Greatly appreciated and most important of all, thoroughly enjoyed by all the guests.
Dianne Hepworth, Nimbus Solutions International Ltd

Hope you are very well, many thanks for all your help on 8th May, it was a
fantastic day, and we’ve had lots of good feedback from people who really enjoyed your lunch speech especially!
Janine Parry, Conference Organiser, Reed Employment

Cheers John
Great job, well read, certain to work together again.
Sam Goodwin, Kensington Mortgages

Many thanks for your speech at our client dinner – you were terrific!! The feedback on your performance was outstanding. We really did appreciate your performance which most definitely helped bring about a very successful night.
Barry Smith, Chief Executive, Ageas Insurance

Thank you so much for Friday night – the evening went fantastically well and
people were very impressed with your memory ability! I don’t think anyone
was quite expecting what they got! I’ll be speaking to Kevin later in the week, and will be sure to pass on our praise!
Natalie Wing Exhibition Operations Manager, Faversham House Group Ltd

Thank you so much for your speech at our Awards dinner at Enginuity on Thursday night. I have received nothing but excellent feedback from everyone involved.      Maxine Burgess, Aga Rayburn

John, Thanks for the great job on Monday evening in Lisbon. I have had many positive comments all day today. See you again!
Jamie Cooper, Conference Organiser, Pro Clarity plc

John, I really enjoyed your after dinner appearance at the University of the Highlands and Islands IT Conference in Nairn earlier this year. Possibly the finest after-dinner experience yet! Thank you. One of my business interests is Chairmanship of a “family” of four hotels near Glencoe, West Scotland. It would be wonderful to invite you to a management “think tank” event . . . please contact me to discuss your availability.
Laurence Young, Chairman, Freedom of the Glen Hotels

The party seemed to be going so well, and the atmosphere so relaxed, that I wondered if we were about to gild the lily………… But the lily has never been better gilded! You were everything we hoped, and the do certainly ended on a mountainous high. People were unanimously full of praise; apart from your humour, they were flabbergasted at your memory. Well done indeed – and many thanks for making the trip!
Victor Segal Director, Singer and Friedlander Merchant Bank

From note pushed under hotel room door at 2 a.m. (!):
Simo – feedback at the bar after your speech was absolutely phenomenal!! Everyone loved you!! Well done and MANY MANY thanks!
David Chapman, Head of Operations, Civil Aviation Authority Safety Regulation Group

John – more feedback from last night – absolutely outstanding!!! No-one had less praise than that for you – I was in awe of you!!!!! You must be very pleased. Robert Webb stated that he wants to book you for the BA Board meeting!! (I hope my 10% is in the post!!!!!!) Well done and thanks again – simply brilliant!!
David Chapman, Head of Operations, Civil Aviation Authority Safety Regulation Group

We were very pleased to have your excellent services and I can assure you that the feedback from our managers has been first class. Mike was immensely pleased with your speech and the only problem for us now, is what are we going to do next time!! Tom Hamilton, Head of External Relations, Civil Aviation Authority Safety Regulation Group

Thank you for your presentations at our recent conference in Malaga. From the feedback forms both the conference keynote on creativity and your after-dinner speech went down very well. Once gain thank you for a truly wonderful couple of presentations.
Jeff Whiteway, Managing Director, Oyez Straker Office Supplies

Hi John: Thank YOU for your speech at our supplier dinner at Chewton Glen – you certainly added to the success of the evening. Everyone was amazed at the way you remembered the names at each table! It was truly a great performance – thanks again.
Sue Gregory, Administration Officer, Westland Transmissions Limited

From note by audience member to her manager (copied to John):
I attended a dinner last night and the after dinner speaker was excellent.
I was extremely impressed by his professionalism and by the way he engaged the audience and kept our attention in an original and entertaining manner, while also delivering the key messages on behalf of the organisation. He reminded me of the effective presentation style of the Red Arrows team that Prudential used at the BT event at Gleneagles, as they also delivered the important messages, in a captivating manner. He would be ideal for any of our future conferences.
Katharine Nicholson, Business Transformation, Prudential
Following Electronics Scotland conference at Gleneagles (attended by Scottish First Minister)

Thank you for an absolutely splendid job at Gleneagles last night. The feedback was tremendous, and people thoroughly enjoyed your performance.
Ashley Evans, Conference Organiser, Electronics Scotland

John, many thanks for your speech at our sales conference. Everybody is still talking about it, and the whole thing worked better than we could ever have expected – all credit to you! Keep well and good luck in the future. Simon McPherson, Sales Director, Kronos Systems Ltd

John – May I add my thanks from Kronos for your contribution to our sales conference to those expressed by Mac earlier. The whole event was a huge success – here is a quote from one of the team who really wasn’t keen on attending at all and had to be talked into it by Laura:
“I think the highlight which so many people have talked about was the after dinner speaker. That was a real novelty and superbly executed!”
Your attention to detail and preparation was obvious and everyone was totally surprised. Our MD was very nervous about the prospect of having an after dinner speaker – but as it turned out he was thrilled. Many thanks again. Kate Westaway, EMEA Marketing Manager, Kronos Systems Ltd

Hi John, Thanks for a great night at our dealer conference. We all found you fascinating and very much enjoyed your speech. I’ve never had so many ‘pats on the back’ for choosing a good after dinner speaker – so thank you! Keith Child, Isuzu Truck

Thank you for the wonderful ‘Business Address’ you gave at our client dinner last Friday. You caught the mood of the evening exactly right with a wonderful blend of humour, and audience participation. Everyone left on a high and the evening has created immense value in promoting the name of Nat West in the local business community. David Russell, Corporate Director, Nat West

Dear John, Thank you for a tremendous couple of performances on Friday. The morning session on Presentation Skills for our regional Presidents was extremely well received and the participants have said that we should continue our relationship with you so that we can have similar sessions in the future. The evening session for 350 diners has gone down with everyone as the best after-dinner speech that they have attended. Well deserved. When I met you in Aberdeen I was of the same view and it’s always good when a recommendation works in a different situation. The amount of work you put into each presentation is impressive and certainly yielded great benefit for all.
Richard Glenister, Director General, Pipeline Industries Guild

Thanks for your excellent presentation during our Sales conference last week. Your professionalism, delivery and sense of humour caught the mood of our conference exactly and made a big contribution to our overall success.
Paul Harris, Sales Director, Hays Chemical Distribution

We all enjoyed your contribution to our sales conference. I would specifically like to thank you for the motivational and business related aspects of your performance which were very relevant
Bob Parsons, Revenue Sales Manager, Arjo Mecanaids

Thank you for another wonderful performance last night. It must have been a difficult audience with different nationalities who didn’t all know each other. I thought you pitched it perfectly and my overseas colleagues all told me that their customers had a thoroughly enjoyable evening.
Nick Rawlings, European Marketing Manager, 3M Healthcare

Our guest speaker John Simonett cleverly wove our project vision into his talk. It was very entertaining and emphasised the important messages we were trying to get over far more memorably than anything else we could have done!
Editorial, Shearwater Project Newsletter, Shell Exploration:

I have been to a number of dinners and have never seen any after-dinner speaker receive a standing ovation. It really was a most memorable evening for which I thank you enormously.
Nigel Hayden, Chairman, British Insurance and Investment Brokers Association

Your performance at our Senior Management dinner party was quite outstanding. The best bit for me was watching their faces drop when I introduced you as the after-dinner expert on the Maastricht Social Chapter. Priceless!
Andrew Cosslettt, Managing Director, Cadbury Schweppes Ltd

Absolutely magic! Your performance at our Annual Dinner in Harrogate last week was the story of the conference and congratulations poured in from all our guests afterwards.
Chris Law, Classified Advertisements Manager, Daily Mail

A huge thank-you for the part you played in hosting this year’s sales conference which was the most successful to date. Feedback has been very positive and everyone was impressed by your enthusiasm and professionalism.
Denise Howden, Conference Organiser, Scottish Power

“The speaker at our Sales Conference last year was good, but your performance at St. Pierre last night was simply brilliant. Your ‘presentation’ was one of the most professional and accomplished I have ever seen”
Peter Hannett, Sales Promotion Manager, Armitage Shanks Ltd

“We have used many showbiz ‘names’ at our various conferences and I can honestly say that in my 15 years with the company I don’t think anybody has entertained us more effectively or humorously than yourself”
Ian Pritchard, Trade Marketing Manager, Elida Faberge

“Thank you for your splendid contribution to the Database Marketing Seminar. The day was just beginning to drift into that familiar conference tedium when you stepped out to smack the audience between the eyes – it transformed the day. The whole lunchtime atmosphere bubbled when it could have been quiet.”
Russell Logan, Conference Chairman, British Direct Marketing Association

“Just a note to thank you for your excellent after-dinner ‘speech’ last week. I was well aware of your skills as an entertainer and was most pleased at your ability to come ‘in disguise’ as a speaker on marketing services.”
David Rice, Marketing Manager, Schindler Lifts Ltd.

“Thank you for the excellent performance you gave to our sales team at Coventry. The fact you were fully five minutes into your speech before they began to realise you were not from ‘Head Office’ is a tribute to your professionalism.”
John Jackson, Managing Director, Brooke Bond Foodservice Ltd

“The feedback I have had following your after-dinner speech at our conference last week is that your performance was viewed as brilliant. From my point of view we could not have chosen a better entertainer for the occasion, especially for the way you conveyed our ‘quality’ theme.”
Mike Abrahams, Logistics Manager, 3M (UK) Ltd

John. You did an excellent job for us last Wednesday evening – we’ve had some great feedback. Glad you enjoyed it!
Sam Hunt, Events Manager, National Builders Merchants Society

As I am sure you will have realised we all thoroughly enjoyed the speech which you provided on Saturday evening. It made a very welcome change from the ‘heavier’ type of after-dinner speeches the Institute often arranges!
John Whiting, President, The Institute of Taxation

When the people in the room are your own community you tend to focus all the more on ensuring the meeting achieves all it’s objectives. Despite all the conferences and major events I have been involved with, this one bothered me more! However knowing you were closing the event on our behalf was tremendously reassuring, and all of our expectations were exceeded yet again.
Gerard Moore, Executive Director, Human Resources
St Jame’s Place (formerly J. Rothschild Assurance plc)

From a letter to booking agent:
Please pass on our thanks and appreciation to John Simonett for his contribution to our development days. He was a great success. The comments have included: ‘Brilliant!’ ; ‘Funny and Informative’ ; ‘Refreshing and Entertaining’ . His contribution was obviously substantial to what I regard as having been some very productive days.
Iain Russell, Director and General Manager,
The Assessment Network Ltd

John, thank you for being the core of one of the best ever MPMA annual dinners. You generate an interesting array of reactions – amusement, awe, amazement – and that’s without delving any further into the alphabet! We were absolutely delighted with your contribution to the evening and I hope we have the opportunity of working with you again.
Nick Mullen, President, Metal Packaging Manufacturers Association

Thank you once again for your first class performance at The National Maritime Museum in Aberdeen last Monday. We were delighted with the response to the launch of our new product and there is no doubt that your presentation was the highlight of the evening for many of our guests.
Emma Hendry, Administration Manager, Nautronix Ltd (Offshore Technology Group)

I cannot begin to congratulate my self for inviting you to speak at Friday’s lunch! It was a fantastic success, and you made it! We have had so many calls to-day thanking us for such a brilliant “do” – everyone commenting on your incredible skills.
Alison Cumberland, Overseas and Development Director, Wood and Pilcher


and from the main Testimonials page:

We needed a speaker for a dinner and presentation evening for a group of future leaders who were completing a year long, high-profile managerial course. We wanted to secure someone that would be able to entertain and engage the group, and able to achieve that with a relatively small number of just 20.

John was able to use his experiences and business knowledge in an engaging manner that was perfect for our event. John exceeded our expectations in terms of his ability to personalise his speech to our audience. They were wholeheartedly impressed by his feats of memory and he had the group in raptures of laughter from the start.

Our evening was a great success and we believe our objective in providing an inspiring and funny speaker was more than fulfilled. We will not hesitate in calling on John again for our next event, he has a warmth, charm and great delivery style that is a valuable commodity.
Andy Rowe, Training Director, Fiat Group Automobiles

Can I just say I thought your performance was excellent and my reserved comments are clearly bettered by those who have commented to me since and used phrases, such as “Brilliant”, “Remarkable” and “Outstanding”.
Mal Fairhurst, Treasurer, Insurance Institute of Leicester

John: Following our regional officers dinner I am happy to let you know that I have already recommended you to two other event organising companies since I can do so with the absolute confidence that you will provide an evening to remember. The verbal response from our members was stunning!
Martin Wells, Head of Operations, The Personal Finance Society

Many thanks for your contribution to our senior management conference over the last two days. The team very much appreciated your humour and amazing memory – and the key messages certainly stimulated thought and discussion. Your contribution was much appreciated. With my thanks.
Lyn Nicholls, HR Director, Ageas

Hi John
Thanks again for being the superb icing on the Whirlpool cake – your delivery and messages into the PJH team event on the evening were perfect, and as you saw from their reaction very much appreciated. The morning after they were still talking in animated terms about how much they enjoyed your speech so I think you can be sure that you have created a few more JS believers! Great to work together again, I really enjoyed it and was delighted it went so well for us both. Best Regards   Andy Burns, Head of Marketing, Whirlpool Corporation

I am writing on behalf of the President, Board of Directors, Members and Guests of The Scottish Oil Club to thank you for your speech at our annual dinner on Friday. I have received much positive feedback. I know I especially liked your talk and I think it’s the best that I’ve heard in the five years I’ve been doing this event. Thanks!!! Rob Schneider, Executive Secretary, The Scottish Oil Club

From letter to booking agent:
John was exceptionally good the other evening. He requested an extensive brief on the audience and the industry at large. His grasp of that brief and his recall never ceases to amaze me. The dinner was the first of its type in this particular conference and it was important therefore to ensure that all went well. We went for John as he is not only a safe pair of hands (we used him in 2000 at the Belfry as well) but can also connect with his audience really well. There is no doubt John helped to get our two day conference off to a great start and I would have no hesitation is recommending him to anyone.
John Cessford, Marketing Manager, BOCM Pauls

We are still basking in the glory of what many reckon was the best dinner in a good many years, and it doesn’t take a genius to work out this was largely due to you. John, you were absolutely superb. Through all the years I have seen after-dinner speakers I don’t think I have seen anyone with such sharp humour, and who was so original, so topical and so thoroughly professional.
David Ross, Hon Dinner Secretary, Leeds Insurance Institute

Thanks for your efforts at our pre IMA lunch on the Thames. It went really well and feedback on your talk was fantastic – some clients came up to me and said it was the best thing they had seen.
Neil Bridge, Head of UK Retail Sales, Schroder Investment Management Ltd

Thank you very much for entertaining our guests in such a refreshingly different and unique way last Wednesday evening! You really brought the evening together for us and helped to make it such a success.
Camilla Barrett, Marketing Executive, Bales Worldwide Travel

“It is a great comfort to an event organiser to know that they can rely absolutely on an after-dinner speaker, and you met our expectations to the full. Everyone to whom I have spoken on the subject was greatly impressed and amused, and you clearly hit just the right note”
Peter J. Maskell, Chief Executive, British Health Care Association

A personal thank you for your presentation at our Financial Managers Association lunch. From the feedback received you were very well received by the attendees. Your memory was the main talking point at the end of the programme! Thank you for making the overall event such a success.
David Bowen, Head of Finance Skills Development, Healthcare Financial Managers Association

Dear John
Thank you very much for the wonderful job you did at our Annual Management Conference at the Marriott Damlahoy last week. It was an incredible evening and gloriously funny. I have received nothing but fantastic comments from all that attended with most of them saying it was the best they had heard. Well done and again thank you.     John McConnell, HR Director, Aesica Pharmaceuticals Ltd

I just wanted to say how very much I enjoyed your presentation at the Securities and Investments Institute dinner in Bournemouth, and our time together at the table. You were simply outstanding, and you will long live in my memory for your great humour, wit and talent.
Lee Bailey, Williams de Broe Stockbrokers

Just a quick line to thank you for last night – you went down a storm and were thoroughly enjoyed by all! If we can use you again somehow, we most certainly will!    Carol Michaelides, Gist Ltd

At our annual dinner for 450 people, the star was undoubtedly John Simonett who I had not heard speak before. He gave one of the most dazzling displays I have ever witnessed – fluency beyond belief, humourous, attention grabbing and holding, and his ability to memorize dozens of names of people in the audience was astonishing!
Mike Rainey, The Insurance Institute of Southampton (writing to booking agent)

Thanks for your considerable contribution to the success of our recent open day. You were an absolute knock-out with our guests, combining humour with on-message business observations.
John Swain, Group Sales and Marketing Director, Plasmor

I wanted to pass on my thanks and appreciation of your speech. It was the general opinion that it was the best we had heard for some years. Humorous, different, brilliantly researched and very well received by all. I am sure you will be getting enquiries from some of the companies represented Thanks again.
David Moore, South Wales & West Branch, Institute of Chartered Shipbrokers.

On behalf of our President Caroline and our Institute I would like to say thank you for your excellent speech at our annual dinner. A good speaker treats the audience as friends in his living room, and that was just how it seemed last night. This being your third appearance those of us who have ‘experienced’ you before thought we knew what to expect, but I think it is right to say that you excelled and surpassed previous occasions. If I have any influence, you will one day be invited to come down again to Exeter to provide us with more laughter, intrigue and friendship.   Nigel Hook, Secretary, The Insurance Institute of Exeter

John: Thank you again for a majestic performance at The Grove last week. We had a fantastic two days of which your contribution was the centrepiece. Yours is a unique talent and I look forward to making use of it again! James Charrington, Head of Retail, EMEA, Merrill Lynch Investment Managers

Thank you very much indeed for coming to speak at the ASIM conference in Cambridge. Having recommended you I was delighted how successful it was! People were greatly amused – and also amazed at your feats of memory. Iain Nicholson, Chairman, Association of Solicitors and Investment Managers

Just a quick note to thank you for a fabulous performance on the evening
of our Sales Conference a couple of weeks ago. I said to you on the evening, and I have no embarrassment in repeating in writing, that you are the best “after-dinner speaker” I have seen (and I’ve seen a lot). You combined humour, memory and audience observation, delivered in a most articulate and impressive way. I haven’t laughed so much in a long time. We ask for feedback on the conference from all attendees, and having trawled through all 106 returns today I can confirm that my own praise is fully supported by the comments from my sales teams. Thank you again for an excellent evening.
Ken Donaldson, National Sales Manager AXA Direct Commercial

Many, many thanks John for your excellent after dinner speech at our annual dinner. Lots of ‘stories/jokes’ that I have not heard before, brilliant memory recall and well presented audience participation! You certainly lived up to my (high) expectations, and were the right person for ‘my’ dinner. All the feedback I have received about the dinner has been complimentary, and it wasn’t my speech they were referring to!   What will I do for next year…….!!
Andrew Dawson, Chairman, Bournemouth Insurance Institute


John is also particularly proud of the following note – from a former pupil of his who now runs a Pub! John was asked to speak at the village cricket club dinner which was held in the Five Mile House at Duntisboure Abbotts in the Cotswolds (purveyors of fine Ales and excellent food!):

“Anything I say is going to come across as rather an understatement, so please take the following and multiply it by at least 100. I know I’m speaking for all those there on Saturday, when I say we thoroughly enjoyed your speech. You have a real gift for keeping us all enthralled, entertained and amused, as proved by the lack of heckling! It’s not often any of my locals are kept entertained for more than two minutes, let alone all of them at once for the best part of an hour. Your blend of memory and humour is fantastic, it was as though you’ve spent the last ten years sat in the bar, and then condensed all the best bits into one long joke. Truly amazing.” Jo Carrier, Proprietor, Five Mile House, Duntisbourne Abbots  September 2008

If you’d like John to entertain your guests or colleagues after-dinner – with a business focus – please call him to discuss your event!

Office:  +44 1453 828568
Mobile: +44 7774 675222

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